"The blind men approached him
and Jesus said to them, 'Do you believe that I can do this?' 'Yes, Lord,' they
said to him. Then he touched their eyes and said, 'Let it be done for you
according to your faith.' And their eyes were opened." - Matt. 9:28-30
The healing miracles of Jesus are
passages I revisit and relate to deeply. Unlike the lame, deaf, and lepers of
the Gospels, my affliction was that I spent much of my life trying to be what I
thought others wanted me to be -- clinging fiercely to ego and image over
authenticity. Like an artist carefully crafting his own portrait, I tried to
control life, even manipulate it, hoping to get the love, understanding, and
validation absent in childhood. I refused to see that the more I tried to
get these things from others, the more it eluded me. Year after year, the
yearning consumed me like a fire, and stumbling like a blind man, I only hurt
others and myself.
After a tremendous loss, turning
away from God, and long period of profound desolation, I was gifted with the
blank canvas needed to ask his mercy and have faith. Christ invited me to
let go of my self-inflicted blindness and to instead trust him. It took
time, but with sight restored, I finally saw how masterful an artist He is, how
with every slow and beautiful brushstroke He illuminated the grace that had
been there all along. With his love, I have realized a new me, the real
me, and for the first time in my life I feel a deep gratitude, wholeness, and
understanding -- still flawed but no longer broken.
Pope Francis has called Christian
life "the journey of endurance" -- a sometimes painful but hopeful
walk toward a strength and peace made available only through faith. Let
us remember that with a hand outstretched, Jesus patiently stands with us ready
to share our journey. Through the darkness and light, he is there, and
all we must do is dare to trust again.
I invite you to take a few moments
in your busy day. In this present moment, what does my faith means to me?
How does it strengthen me? Is there any blindness within me waiting to be
healed?
Albert Wolff
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