“The people who walked in darkness have seen a great
light; upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shone. You have
brought them abundant joy and great rejoicing…” Is. 9:1-2
Just before Christmas we
experience the “darkest night” of the year – December 21 has the least daylight
of any day in the year and the longest night. Every day that follows gets
increasingly brighter. The readings for the Mass During the Night
capture the essence of movement from darkness into light, out of slavery and
desolation into joy and hope.
Many of us come to
Christmas Day with the same brokenness in our families, the same weakness in
ourselves in need of healing, the same areas of unfreedom in prayer. In past
years I would show up at Christmas Mass and feel like a sham: How can I
celebrate the light when I still feel like I am in the darkness?
While on silent retreat a
few years ago, a dear Jesuit friend offered me what has become a very helpful
image. After I had shared what I was struggling with during confession, he said
“Can you imagine yourself taking this and offering it at the altar during Mass?
Visualize yourself carrying it and laying it as the gifts are brought forward.”
This simple exercise has
become a regular habit for me. Each week when I go to Mass, I imagine even the
most painful parts of who I am and the things I struggle with the most being
offered as gifts. Can I imagine that my entire being (with all its failings and
shortcomings) is as sacred as the bread and wine being offered? The words of
the great Persian mystic Hafiz describe what making this offering feels like
for me.
Each Soul Completes Me
Hafiz, translated by Daniel Ladinsky
My
Beloved said,
"My name is not complete without yours."
I thought:
How could a human's worth ever be such?
And God knowing all our thoughts — and all
our
thoughts are innocent steps on the path —
then addressed my
heart,
God revealed
a sublime truth to the world,
when He
sang,
"I am made whole by your life. Each
soul,
each soul completes
me."
What happens when I imagine offering my whole self today at Mass? Does imagining God saying to me: “I am made whole by your life” evoke
any emotions or movements in me?
soulful verse! I like these days attend church and be closer to God even in these days
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